25 Aug 2013, 10:40 am
3rd March, 1901. Moscow.
Nobody said ruling Russia would be easy; but sometimes, it becomes simply onerous. Currently I am at the Imperial Bolshoi Theatre of Moscow, a glorious building that has presented the best ballets and operas in the world. Until today.
I am attending (enduring) a performance of "le nez en surpoids", a ballet in seven acts by Mikhail Kuryakin Natashka-Romanov Ima Sonofabitch, a second cousin, by marriage. Fortunately, this is a private performance and the proper classes of Moscow citizens will never have to sit through this 5-hour marathon. In fact, most of the principal dancers have already retired from exhaustion, being replaced by understudies who are gamely trying to survive the tortue. As for the music, the less heard, the better. To be blunt, it sounds like a roomful of drunken peasants. Hah! Hah! I made a joke. Peasants are always drunk! Nevertheless, to all who observe, I appear polite, alert and complimentary (May the Heavenly Father grant me the stamina!). After all, I am Tzar Nikolay Alexandrovich Romanov, Emperor and Autocrat of All the Russias!
I just had a brilliant plan: I will award Mikhail with a 3 year traveling stipend to perform his ballet in every village and far corner of the great Russian Empire. Starting tomorrow. And I'll make his mother the official Royal Agent. That will get her out of my hair, as well. Ah, Nichie, you are starting to show signs of brilliance!
Nobody said ruling Russia would be easy; but sometimes, it becomes simply onerous. Currently I am at the Imperial Bolshoi Theatre of Moscow, a glorious building that has presented the best ballets and operas in the world. Until today.
I am attending (enduring) a performance of "le nez en surpoids", a ballet in seven acts by Mikhail Kuryakin Natashka-Romanov Ima Sonofabitch, a second cousin, by marriage. Fortunately, this is a private performance and the proper classes of Moscow citizens will never have to sit through this 5-hour marathon. In fact, most of the principal dancers have already retired from exhaustion, being replaced by understudies who are gamely trying to survive the tortue. As for the music, the less heard, the better. To be blunt, it sounds like a roomful of drunken peasants. Hah! Hah! I made a joke. Peasants are always drunk! Nevertheless, to all who observe, I appear polite, alert and complimentary (May the Heavenly Father grant me the stamina!). After all, I am Tzar Nikolay Alexandrovich Romanov, Emperor and Autocrat of All the Russias!
I just had a brilliant plan: I will award Mikhail with a 3 year traveling stipend to perform his ballet in every village and far corner of the great Russian Empire. Starting tomorrow. And I'll make his mother the official Royal Agent. That will get her out of my hair, as well. Ah, Nichie, you are starting to show signs of brilliance!
