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Adjutant
 
Posts: 3645
Joined: 17 May 2013, 3:32 pm

Post 30 Sep 2017, 10:58 am

The Austrians are upset. Their foreign Minister complains to his counter-part

Austrian Foreign Minister: "You have invaded our country and taken Trieste. This means war!"
Foreign Minister Butlano: "It was all a misunderstanding. The Army of the North read a sign wrong on maneuvers, took a wrong turn, and wound up in Trieste. You know...we Italians are terrible at war!"
Austrian Foreign Minister: "But if it was a mistake...how come they haven't left yet?"
Foreign Minister Butlano: "Once they had the local strudel, the schnitzel, the coffee, the beer--the women!--they did not want to leave. Italians are lovers...not warriors!"
Austrian Foreign Minister: "We Austrians are not naive..we know about your secret Plan X to annex Trieste!"
Foreign Minister Butlano: (to himself) Gosh darn it! The foreign ministry is like a sieve. "I am sure I don't know what you mean...what, uh, Plan X?"
Austrian Foreig Minister: "You're lying. I saw your eyelid twitch. If that army is not out of Trieste forthwith...we are forcing it out."
Foreign Minister Butlano: "Gee...you guys need to work on your hospitality if you want more tourists..."
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Adjutant
 
Posts: 3645
Joined: 17 May 2013, 3:32 pm

Post 07 Oct 2017, 8:36 am

It's been six months...and still the Italian army has not left Trieste! The Austrians are not amused...their foreign Minister calls his counter-part to complain.

Austrian Foreign Minister: "You promised the Great Northern Army would leave by now...it's still there!"
Foreign Minister: "Really? I gave the order...let me see what happened. I'll call you back."

He calls back a short time later...

Foreign Minister Butlano: "Well...you see it's like this--Austrian partisan blew up bridges connecting Venice to Trieste so our troops could not make it back. Italian troops hate marching anyway...
Austrian Foreign Minister: "Those were Italian combat engineers who blew up those bridges!"
Foreign Minister Butlano: "Oh. Would you believe...that our troops mutinied and refuse to obey orders?"
Austrian Foreign Minister: "No!"
Foreign Minister Butlano: "Would you believe...the women of Trieste would not let our troops go because Italians are such better lovers?"
Austrian Foreign Minister: "No!"
Foreign Minister Butlano: "Would you believe...our troops have become pacifists and refuse to fight?"
Austrian Foreign Minister: "No!"
Foreign Minister Butlano: "Incidentally, fyi, Trieste has been renamed New Venice..." (click)