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Post 21 Feb 2017, 3:58 pm

Yesterday the BA-ANG team came to me with a successor for the failing "Squiggly Arrow" competition. They proposed the "MAD Order Award".

Okay, at first I only thought that spells "Mao", and that's some Chinese communist. But its easy to switch the letters O and A when under pressure, believe me.

So after some fact checking, it was decided "if anyone nukes anyone" gets the MAD Order Award so far.

Then! someone looking to get promoted suggested calling it The Chilean Gambit. It has a certain ring. Though at the risk of sounding intellectual - absolutely out of character trust me! - I called him out on his interpretation of "gambit". And he pointed out this was just an establishment view. Definitely has a bright future that one.

Onwards and downwards, we need to build the foundation for the future!
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Post 22 Feb 2017, 7:02 am

Exciting news! I've decided to devote more time to my blog and my cat. And I'm introducing ads - costs are spiralling out of control trust me! So over to my sponsor....

***Mexican Rubble. Need we say more?***

...so I was talking to the BA-ANG leader, when Bang! my security guard shot him stone cold. Turned out the BA-ANG leader was a Canadian spy and they'd long taken control of the BA-ANG HQ. Is nothing sacred?...

***Do you suffer from over-exposure? Buy our Mexican rubble, good for all that ails you***

...next thing I know BANG! BANG! BANG! and then BANG! BANG! BANG! and then some more BANGS!...I think...I lost count. This is a record breaking event, being the target of so many nukes. Who said Mexicans don't excel at anything?

So I'm now at my secret hideout, built by new pal, the CEO of Mexican Rubble, and its the best! It blends in perfectly with the landscape.

Have to go and feed the cat! Later folks!

***This blog is brought to you by Mexican Rubble Inc. If you have trouble, we have the rubble.***
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Post 26 Feb 2017, 1:53 pm

After feeding the cat, I signed loads of executive orders believe me!

Some examples...

***Do you think its all over? Try our Mexican Rubble and anything is possible***

...(EO02) Theists, Atheists and Humanists can't enter the country. This has nothing to do with beliefs. Its humanitarian. We can't accommodate them except in places that might become rubble...

***Experts agree(1), Mexican Rubble means a bright future in a dark age***

...(EO15) Every home must own at least one cat. This will help reduce the number of mutant rats, mice, and small birds...

*** "I built my wall with bricks and it got nuked. Now I use only Mexican Rubble" ***

...(EO59) Comrade Paul's secret hideout will become a pilgrimage site. Future generations will remember the glory and forget the ignominy of a dubious defeat.

And so many more, the most executive orders signed by anyone in the history of everywhere!

Have to cut this short, the cat wants grooming..

***This blog is brought to you by Mexican Rubble Inc. in association with the Campaign to Save Ohio from the Canadians. If you have the trouble, we have the rubble.***

-----------------------

(1) based on study of 2 people
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Post 10 Mar 2017, 5:16 am

Sad to say, the cat died. Tried to eat a radiactive rat with five heads. More heads than I've ever seen on a rat. I saw a two-headed rat once. SAD! But five heads is just greedy.

***Hubble bubble toil and trouble, get yourself some Mexican Rubble***

The guys at the reformed BA-ANG - every one of them a Mexican trust me - made Mexico great again this year! Biggest nuke range increase ever of any nation in the history of NWO! This is a special achievement, second only to being listed in the Guiness Book of Records for "Most Inbound Nukes".

***8 out of 10 cats prefer radioactive Mexican Rubble***

Anyway, I was feeding the rat when Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, Bang, my security guard shot every head stone cold. Then I woke up. It was warm and quiet and the sun rising - sunrise in a recently nuked city is a work of art believe me! - so I went to feed the five-headed rat when Bang(x5), then, yes, I woke up "again". Those kinds of dreams keep me entertained all night.

My new friend the CEO of Mexican Rubble Inc. told me they still had healthy stock levels but demand next year might outstrip supply. We agreed that's the kind of problem a business welcomes.

p.s.
I've just learnt that the winter results don't reflect the great work done by the great guys at BA-ANG. The culprit will get a piece of my mind, though only a tiny piece since I lost most of it already.
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Post 16 Mar 2017, 3:10 pm

First up - what with everyone closing in on what's left of Mexico - I'm imposing a moratorium on shooting radioactive wildlife. Being amongst the most ecologically diverse nations in the world, the level of mutation here puts Mexico in the running for the most ecologically diverse nation.

Second issue - after drinking much of the Chilean tequila, the BA-ANG team have disappeared. GONE! To say I'm upset is something you might say. I only miss the thrill, the squiggly arrows, and my cat. And anyway, BA-ANG was piss-poor compared to the Australian team that worked 24/7 figuring a route to Lyon.

Third issue is there are no more issues....nowadays I watch re-runs of Happy Days. I'll stare out the window during advert breaks. I'll cook and eat solitary meals. And whilst washing the dishes I might recall that bright future that became a little to bright. But it will pass.
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Post 21 Mar 2017, 8:39 am

Comrade Paul wrote:Second issue - after drinking much of the Chilean tequila, the BA-ANG team have disappeared. GONE! To say I'm upset is something you might say. I only miss the thrill, the squiggly arrows, and my cat. And anyway, BA-ANG was piss-poor compared to the Australian team that worked 24/7 figuring a route to Lyon.


Don't sell them so short, Comrade. It was members of the BA-ANG team who found that route. Chilean Tequila opens many doors.